Archive for the ‘comedy’ Category

Code Zed: Signs of the Coming Apocalypse

Nollaig 2, 2008

A new blog called Code Zed: Signs of the Coming Apocalypse has been launched by Saoirsí. If you like Zombie movies, social satire, weird science, and esoteric lore, you’ll love this. There’s one caveat: everything on the blog comes from real life – you really can’t make this stuff up.

Some may question the good taste, if not the morality – or even the sanity – of putting Japanese war crimes on a par with Krispy Kreme Bacon Cheeseburgers as a sign of the end times. But then, in an era when Henry Kissinger can get a Nobel Peace Prize, and Merton-Scholes a Sveriges Riksbank Prize for quantifying financial risk, the Universe must already have a pretty sick sense of humour.

It is the intention of the author to actually set up a voluntary citizen-intiative, based on the Civil Defence: Code ZED – Zombie Education and Defence association.

There are Some Things Money Can’t Buy. For Everything Else…

Samhain 26, 2008

World War II:

$3.6 trillion.

The Louisiana Purchase, New Deal, Marshall Plan, Korean War, Race to the Moon, NASA, Vietnam War, S&L Crisis, and Invasion of Iraq:

$3.92 trillion.

Still-rising $4.6165 trillion Bailout*:

Priceless.

There are Some Things Money Can’t Buy. For Everything Else, there’s Taxpayers.

"Your credit rating is so poor, Mr. McGee, that not only are we authorized to cut your CARD in half..."

* Figures from http://www.ritholtz.com/blog/2008/11/big-bailouts-bigger-bucks/
Hat tip to http://www.huffingtonpost.com/ and http://www.offthemark.com

Are you a taxpayer?

Samhain 16, 2008

The great and the good of capitalism were holding a requiem dinner for the global financial system at a secret hideaway:

“If the interest rates hadn’t been so low, we wouldn’t be in this mess!” said the bond trader, “I blame the central banks!”

“We told you that you were under-pricing risk,” said the central banker, “I blame the mortgage lenders!”

“We were forced to take on more borrowers just to stay in the game” said the mortgage lender, “I blame all those derivatives products!”

“We were promoting efficiency by allowing you to spread your risks,” said the structured-finance specialist, “I blame the ratings companies!”

“We relied on the computer models that the banks helped us build,” said the credit-rating assessor, “I blame the wholesale markets funding it!”

“We relied on money-markets because the savings deposits weren’t high enough,” said the commercial banker. “I blame the regulators!”

“We allowed you to maximize shareholder returns,” said the regulator. “I blame those greedy investors!”

“We were trying to fund the retirements of thousands in a collapsing market” said the pension-fund manager. “I blame the hedge funds!”

“We had nobel prize winners on staff,” said the hedge-fund manager, “I blame the irrationality of ordinary man.”

Just then, the waiter arrived with the bill.

“Are you a taxpayer?” asked the central banker.

The waiter nodded.

“We were hoping you would foot the bill.”

Everyone’s a comedian II

Samhain 9, 2008

Sarah Palin! Tina Fey’s impression on Saturday Night Live (Katie Couric interview, VP debates etc.) So good that the suits in NBC have effectively banned it from the Internet outside the US, until they can figure out how to charge somebody fees… you have to wonder if these guys would ban VHS tapes if given the chance – I mean, you can just record anything you want off of the TeeVee, and then swap it with friends! The horror!

These are courtesy of our good friends at http://www.thepiratebay.org

VP debate:
http://www.airstripone.com/images/tina_fey_sarah_palin_vp_debate_snl.flv

http://www.airstripone.com/images/tina_fey_sarah_palin_vp_debate_snl.m4v

Tina Fey/Sarah Palin with John McCain, Saturday Night Live, QVC spoof:
http://www.airstripone.com/images/tina_fey_sarah_palin_john_mccain_snl.m4v

Tina Fey/Sarah Palin, “Hillary”, SNL skit:
http://www.airstripone.com/images/tina_fey_sarah_palin_hillary_clinton_snl.m4v

Tina Fey/Sarah Palin, “Katie Couric” interview, SNL spoof:
http://www.airstripone.com/images/tina_fey_sarah_palin_katie_couric_interview_snl.m4v